“I don’t know my birth family.”

Just this morning, someone at work asked me where I am from originally. I immediately knew how this conversation was going to play out because I’d had this conversation countless times, and it is every bit as awkward as the first time. 

I responded by saying I was from India. When I mentioned that I grew up in the states, the response from this person was, “I can tell!” Wanting to prevent any misunderstanding about my “authenticity”, I decided to add that I was born in India, but then came to America and was raised here. This took him by surprise and I was then bombarded with questions about where I am from in India, where my family is, and do I go visit them often. 

It’s been 23 years and I still don’t know how to approach this. I don’t mind telling people that I’m adopted, but I am never prepared for the questions. Or the looks I get when I explain that I don’t know who my family is nor will I ever probably know. If you’re a fellow adoptee and you have an answer let me know because I stumble over my words every time. 

How do you explain to someone that void?

2 thoughts on ““I don’t know my birth family.”

  1. Ohhh… I can’t imagine how hard it has to be to talk about it everytime somebody asks you :/
    America/States is an immigrant/expat country and EVERY white person is not a native American. You are the same American as they are, regardless of your skin colour. I can’t understand those questions: where are you really from? Annoying :/ All white folks in US should say where they are really from (and ask about it their greatgreatgreatgreatgrandparents). I’m not racist here! I’m white myself. I just have a special attachment to everyone from India πŸ™‚ My husband is from India and my son is half-Indian πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚
    Take care and cut short those conversations. Say you are from India and that’s all. Big hugs :*

    Like

    1. Thank you so much for the comment! It is very annoying. I appreciate that people take an interest, but most of the time they are very ignorant in their approach. How wonderful that you have an Indian connection in your own family! Have a great day!☺️

      Liked by 1 person

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