I just learned about this day a few years ago, and how ironic that it comes the day before Mother’s Day. But it gives me the space to remember you and honor you and all that you were to me and grieve what I lost when we we were separated.
When I saw a medium several years ago I was told you were my spirit guide and I’ve felt you more today than I have in a long time. I got the chance to speak to some like-minded Indian adoptees and when I say it was soul food—literally what I needed as this painful weekend comes up.
I look for you everyday in all that I am and in all I do — in my curly hair, in my dimples, when I wash my face, when I’m laughing. I look for traces of you and wonder what remains. I scour through photos of myself and stare in the mirror hoping to think of some kind of resemblance to a woman whose face I’ve never known.
This is adoption. These are the unknowns. These are the thoughts that consume me this Birthmother’s Day and Mother’s Day weekend. I will forever wonder if thoughts of me consume your mind as well, but no matter what I hold this day in my heart to honor the woman who breathed life into me.
As many of you know, I was interviewed back in April 2018 by my good friend and fellow adoptee Oleg Lougheed who runs his own website and podcast called Overcoming Odds, hoping to let those who grew up in foster care and as adoptees share their stories and let others know they are not alone. The mission is to encourage and empower them to live the life they were born to live and overcome the odds that were thrown their way in life.
In the last few weeks I’ve had several people ask me for the link to my podcast interview, and I realized I never posted it on the blog. Better late than never! For those who already subscribe to the podcast, it is podcast #18 entitled, “Where Do You Belong?”. Here is the link for those asking:
If the link does not work, please comment and let me know and I will do my best to fix it. I hope it is encouraging for atleast one person out there.
Happy New Year!